Coping With Infertility Grief.
Some realities of life at times can be difficult to cope with. At some point in life, we’ll all have to learn to cope with one setback or the other. To cope with infertility, we have to keep in mind that infertility is just one of the many things humans experience. like you already know, infertility, whether temporary or even permanent is certainly not the end of your world.
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Most people do find their ways around infertility. Medical science is increasingly discovering ways to surmount it, yet while couples grapple with it, they’ll need to learn how to cope with infertility.
Infertility is defined as a failure to achieve a pregnancy after attempting to become pregnant for more than 12 months. This article “how to cope with infertility” is for couples that have been trying to conceive for over 12 months.
Infertility is certainly very disruptive of our normal lives. It affects about 1 in 8 couples. That means that infertility is relatively uncommon. This is what makes it even more disturbing. You keep seeing others fall pregnant at the drop of a hat. Naturally, this can be very unsettling. That is why I’m gonna share how to cope with infertility in different conditions and circumstances.
I’ll begin by saying that; “in the long run, happiness in life is a choice”. To cope with infertility is first to deliberately choose to be a happy person.
Remember that there are fertile people who are unhappier than infertile people. There are fertile people who have physical disability, yet choose to be happy despite being born without limbs for instance. What I am saying in essence is that, you can choose to cope with infertility with grace and gallantry.
ON THIS PAGE:
Coping with infertility and childlessness.
Coping with infertility when others are pregnant.
Dealing with infertility as a man.
Coping with infertility in marriage.
Coping With Infertility And Childlessness
One way of coping with infertility and childlessness is to be objective about life. The much we all can do in life is to do our best. That some things may not work out doesn’t mean that our lives are disasters.
I would advise you cope with infertility and childlessness by creating other goals that distract you from being emotionally trapped in the struggle to conceive.
For some, such goals might be seeking to adopt a child. For others, it could be volunteering to do something great or noble. It could even be getting more education or any other self-improvement activity. Such lofty pursuits can suck off negative emotions.
Of course, there may be days that remind you of your dream to carry your biological child, but pursuing lofty goals will definitely boost your sense of accomplishment.
I heard of a British scientist that chose to stay unmarried and childless. He journeyed to Africa in pursuit of research in the mangrove forests. He picked up 3 young men in Nigeria and taught them how to do the scientific researches he was involved in. By the time he died, the 3 young men had become skilled and he willed some of his equipment to them.
I honestly think that the scientist raised great children in those 3 young men. I think he never felt less than people who nurtured their own biological children.
You can cope with infertility and childlessness by getting immersed into something that distracts from constant negative emotions.
Coping With Infertility When Others Are Pregnant.
Anyone struggling with conceiving knows the feeling that wells up when others are pregnant. Not that they are bad people, but jealousy is a normal human feeling. Coping with infertility when others are pregnant requires 2 major things.
I’m gonna help you know what has helped women in coping with infertility when others are pregnant. The first is finding strength in your partner, a friend or whoever you know you can get supporting words from.
The right words from a loved one or a whoever, can condition your mind in coping with infertility when others are pregnant so easily. Share your feelings with that someone that can use words to steady your mind.
You can also join fertility support groups whether online or from fertility clinics. There would be good people in such forums that will help you in coping with infertility when others are pregnant.
The second time-tested way of coping with infertility when others are pregnant is getting reassured about your well being by studying the Bible or other holy books that are reassuring.
Like I earlier said, reassuring words can steady your mind and help in coping with infertility when others are pregnant. For instance; The bible book of Jeremiah 31:3 says, “Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with loving-kindness have I drawn thee”.
In the bible book of Genesis 15:1, it is written that “the word of the LORD came unto Abram in a vision, saying, Fear not, Abram: I am thy shield, and thy exceeding great reward”.
You see, Abram and his wife, Sarah used these words in coping with infertility and childlessness. As you probably know Abraham and his wife finally had a child. The same bible said that the blessings of Abraham are same for all who trust in God. You can be reassured by this.
Note that whatever words that fortify your mind is also good for your body. They help your body relax and function well. Ultimately, many have overcome infertility through reassuring words in the Holy Scriptures.
Dealing With Infertility As A Man.
Infertility affects a man as it does a woman. However, men may have different coping strategies for it. Dealing with infertility as a man involves logically adapting to and being informed about the situation.
It is always helpful to understand a problem while trying to overcome it. In dealing with infertility as a man, you must get well informed about several solutions to infertility and work through it.
For instance, adopting a baby while getting treated for your infertility can help you cope with infertility. For some, engaging in sporting activities helps reducing their infertility induced stress.
Funny enough, having great sex just for the fun of it can help anyone through stress. For instance, doing some very pleasurable sexual activities like oral sex with your partner can do some magic.
Most importantly, knowing that you are doing your best in dealing with infertility as a man gives you a lot of comfort. The key therefore is to as much as possible, get informed about how to overcome infertility and do what you’ve discovered.
Applying information regarding overcoming infertility and its related stress helps in dealing with infertility as a man, as this can give you the feeling that you are in control of your issues regarding your fertility.
Coping With Infertility In Marriage.
In many societies, child bearing is the major goal of marriages. In such places, upon getting married, the bump from a woman’s belly is so eagerly anticipated. When this doesn’t show up within 2 years, the couple get under pressure from societal expectations.
The most important aspect of coping with infertility in marriage is for couples to see the problem as “our infertility problem”. Never should couples see it as the man’s or the woman’s infertility.
The next important way of coping with infertility in marriage is to deliberately create projects that involve and excite you both. For instance, you could both decide to start an adoption process while waiting for your biological child.
Some couples have gotten pregnant shortly after an adoption. The excitement of adoption relaxed their minds. A relaxed mind has a way of helping our bodies to function better.
Since adoption may not be for every couple, other exciting stuff like mastering a certain sport or mastering to dance salsa or perfecting yoga can help with coping with infertility in marriage. The idea is to find something that would engage and challenge your minds. It could even be learning to sing and posting your music production on youtube.
For some rearing animals for sales can become a hubby that distracts from letting infertility occupy too much of their emotions. Coping with infertility in marriage can be much easier when couples are jointly doing stuff that they both are excited about.